Thank you 2010...Welcome 2011!

2010 is my metamorphosis year. My epiphany in turn gave birth to ABCs of me, AyAlogy 101, my still work-in-progress project AngBituin.Com and several other "firsts" and new ventures.

2010 was a testament to the power of visioning and how God's hand turn things around and back. I did not anticipate the problems but in my vision board I envisioned a physically fit, emotionally strong, spiritually grounded happy woman. In hindsight, maybe I was totally crushed so I can start anew.

It was the year when I went from bed-ridden to activity-laden...from being traumatically married to peacefully single...my career went from bad to best.

Now, I am spending like a minimum-wage earner but earning an executive's salary with some passive income on the side. I've never been this stress-free and happy albeit the zero love life. I will always be thankful to this chaotic yet life-changing year.

Amidst the hospital bills, debt payments and make-over costs...the lessons of 2010 is simply priceless.

In 2011, I look forward to:

- A closer relationship with God. I recognize that anything and everything would not be possible without Him. I learned that no matter how networked a person is, there is only one reliable helpline called prayer. I bought a 2011 Bible Diary and intend to journal my conversations with Him. This is similar to the reflections I wrote in "ABCs of Aya" which became too personal to share to the public thus I held back from posting.

- A deeper knowledge of my soul and purpose. I'm always in limbo and I hate confusion. When one is sure of one's self and calling, decisions come easy. When decisions are set you just fire then aim. I now have an idea holder or what most people refer to as their "journal" so I can capture my AyAlogy moments. Writing became my self-portrait...I will continue to sketch that self-portrait until God's project called "me" becomes a masterpiece.

- A wider network so I can help the least, the lost and the last. In 2011, I am very much looking forward to see AngBituin.Com come to life. I have always wanted to chronicle memories and the best way for me to do that is by creating a portal of memorial websites. In it I will write about the unexplored...what most people avoid but what most of us know as inevitable -- death.

- A richer pool of resources by wisely using the time, talent and treasure heaven loaned to me. I haven't bought a planner yet as I still believe that the universe will give me one *wink* *wink* ;)

I am thankful that LittleRunningTeacher.com, WhenInManila.com, VinceGolangco.com and Belle De Jour are giving away several planners for men and women! Find out how you can win here – “http://wp.me/p11LPf-Hx“\

Next on the list: a reliable phone and an iPad. =) While gadgets help my resolve... I know that time management tools come second to will power.

- Become a fitting vessel of the real me. I'd like to be healthier, stronger and in the process improve my metabolic age! As the song goes...there is nobody nobody but me. I can't give what I don't have. That's my primary justification why I'd like to have more. I wish to be more so I can give more.

My plans did not materialize in 2010 but what happened was beyond my imagination. God led me to see how beautiful life is especially if I surrender it all to Him. After all, it is futile to resist what is meant to happen. Thus, in 2011 I won't plan. I will stay in-sync and go with the flow.

After all that has happened, my experience taught me that new year is simply a glorified new day. Everyday people have the chance to become fresh and new. But then again..oh well...I am so thankful that my head is out of the pupa even before the year ends. With that I welcome 2011, knowing that the perfect moment to finally flutter free is very much within reach.

May we all have a blessed and bright year ahead!

Reminiscing Grace to be Born this Christmas

I had the privilege of spending a meaningful birthday celebration at the Grace to be Born shelter in Pasig City last September.



Grace to be Born serves both as a halfway house for unwed mothers and as an orphanage for abandoned babies. If I remember it right, they had 12 mothers and 15 babies.



I initially wanted a pompous birthday celebration after surviving such a tough year. I imagined having a grand launch of AyA version 3.0 -- stronger, wiser and happier. I wanted to fix my hair, get toned and simply be glamorous enough to party.

While it was thrilling to imagine a more fabulous me...I could not silence my calling to be socially sensitive. Around mid-September, a baby boy placed in an airplane trash bag was abandoned in a plane. That news certainly hit a spot. Why would I throw a party and splurge on a drinking spree when there are people who starve in love and thirst for affection?



Thanks to social media and the power of text brigade, I was able to call on a few friends who selflessly donated their time, talent and treasure. We were able to donate some vital signs equipment (BP apparatus, digital thermometer, weiging scale, stethoscope, etc.), medical supplies, toiletries for moms, baby clother with mittens and booties, feeding bottles and trinkets of baby items. I was so delightedly surprised we were able to pool together more than 400 diapers and 15cans + 8 boxes of formula milk in less than 2weeks!



The short lead time did not deter us from having some sort of order. We had a semblance of a programme...complete with powerpoint, music and role assignments. It was a short and crisp but complete programme where humor and heart is balanced.


While waiting for people to arrive and to give us time to fix the "venue", we asked moms to write what they want for Christmas and color the image of Mary holding her son Jesus.


These are some of the "masterpiece" of our moms-to-be. We'll be seeing them soon to hand in their Christmas wish.


Our meal was very simple yet filling. It was a pot-luck of the ever-present pansit, pork barbeque from the neighborhood ihawan and cake rolls from Majo...plus peanuts from Jun.



We prayed...


We played...


and gave away prizes!


And of course for posterity...here's with my college friends: Lai and Vive (who came all the way from Las Pinas and Cavite respectively).


Here's with my former teammates: ChaCha, Jackie and Apple (who gamely prepared Pinoy Henyo moms/baby version--thanks gurls!)


Over-all, I felt and still feel so blessed to have a supportive family and a bunch of positive and beautiful friends who took part in this cause despite the short notice.

Please allow me to thank: Dunn (who commuted from Paranaque to host the program), Jun (who brought my teammates to the venue and for finding time despite his hectic schedule), Kuya Pj (who came from Bicol for agreeing to co-host with Dunn), Majo and her sister (for the milk and cake and effort--your presence is truly valued), Mareng Kate (who captured the moment as our official photographer despite being 7months pregnant herself at that time and for enjoining Lily and Allen to support), Ca, Lai and Vive (for being there in almost every chapter of my life since college), Cha, Jackie and Apple (for all your donations and for being happy angels on earth)and of course my family (for being my source of strength and moolah hahaha need I say more?). I am so thankful that we shared the Grace to be Born experience. It would not have been possible without all of you.



The Lord said, whatever you do to the least of my brethren, you do unto me. As I reminisce that day fresh after the child Jesus' birth, my heart is filled with gratitude and hope. I am grateful for that moment and hopeful for more similar moments to come. As we are given the grace to be born, may our existence be a blessing to others. I wish you all a more meaningful year ahead!

P.S. The Grace to be Born shelter is located at #53 Dr. Sixto Antonio Avenue, Kapasigan, Pasig City. For details, questions or donations, you may call Rey Ortega at 09275010605 or 09228597035, or Myrna Ortega at 09178039139.

Disclaimer: Because the shelter values the privacy and in recognition of the sensitive nature surrounding abandonment and abortion, we were prohibited from taking and posting pictures of the moms and babies housed in Grace to be Born.

Writing my way to get a free BDJ Planner

I just joined an online contest hoping to win a Belle de Jour Planner.

The task was to tell the Editor what my New Year’s resolution is and how I plan to achieve it.

Here's sharing my short and sweet entry:

In 2011, I resolve to make less goals and envision more dreams rooted to God's purpose.

2010 taught me not to rely on my strength alone but heed to God’s will. I wanted to lose 15lbs to be sexier but God didn’t do that. Instead, he took all the dead weight in my life which made me feel lighter and more beautiful even with 15lbs intact.

To bring to life my New Year’s resolution, I will start and end my day in prayer. I will talk less and listen more. God’s message most often than not come in a subtle faint whisper. Thus, I will make time for a “quiet time” everyday. When one is in God’s path, I believe everything else will fall into place effortlessly and in style.

Aanhin pa ang rebond kung meron ka namang kuto? In English: What is beauty when the brain is...haggard?

72hours before Christmas...

It's 3 days before Christmas. Same time last year, I was one of those who frequent the malls. I took advantage of the sign "SALE" and optimize the extended mall hours. I was in a shopping frenzy! All around me was everything "Christmassy" or so I thought. I strut with "Jingle Bells" playing in my head as I run through my shopping list whilst I carry all those bags with gusto.

Now I realize its not the number of people you were able to give gifts or the cost of the gift that matter. Its about spending time despite being penniless to people who matter and those who made me feel I mattered. I know that they know I love them and I know for sure that they love me too.

Though it might seem I don't have any option but to think that way because of my current financial feat I believe that's a healthy mindset to have. Besides, when all else seem falling, its an option to keep your head up, your back straight and your feet grounded...that's my anti-nega-gravity formula.

I still want to shop but I can't shop the way I used to. The circumstances of my life and my eruditions of it changed me...it changed how I viewed Christmas shopping.

It's 3 days before Christmas... I have all the time and space in the world to reflect on things how grateful I am for all that was and has been...and to pray for a better year not just for me but for all who are dear and desolate. This Christmas, I've learned how to appreciate "Silent Night".

Sometimes, people self-destruct to self-preserve.

One man's white elephant can be another person's purple cow.

Sometimes the best way to be okay is to admit that you're not.

Pleasant Paradox

Dear Lord,

Thank you very much for making this a roller coaster year. I am grateful that 2010 is so different from all the other years. Thank you for not giving my goals but for answering my prayers.

I did not lose 15lbs which could have made me sexier. Instead, You took all of my dead weight which I think made me beautiful within. Thank you Lord for knowing and doing what's best for me.

I was not able to save Php300k which could have helped me feel secure and confident. Instead, I had to pay and still am paying for conjugal debts incurred because of love but got out of hand because of foolishness. Thank you Lord for the humbling experience. I am at peace knowing that I am totally dependent on your goodness.

I wanted to have a happy family. I planned to conceive on our second wedding anniversary. Yet, what I had was a broken marriage. Thank you for saving me from a closet sociopath. I did not gave birth to a child but have personally experienced Jesus' birth into my life.

For all this and a whole lot more left unsaid, thank you!

Ang madalang humirit, may banat na malupit.

Maybe good girls can learn something from girl-wannabes.